Well, it’s a revolution of a sort…

Earlier in November, we mentioned the output a company that claimed to have a “revolutionary automated system [that] is changing the face of PR.”  The revolution seemed to involve trying to convince science writers to cover a shipping company. As we went through some of our other off-target pitches, we began to realize that the revolution was much bigger than that, and involved convincing science writers to write about nearly everything but science.

Here, for example is an offer for an interview with the man behind what appears to be a Netflix-style service for neckties:

Hey [redacted]!

I have a great feature idea for you! How about a feature about “How to dress your man for the Holidays” or “The Perfect Gift for a Man this Holiday”??! Finally there is a way for men to look their best without spending so much money! My client, FreshNeck is changing the fashion world… one tie at a time. The company provides it’s members with ties, bow ties, pocket squares and cufflinks…. all for a monthly premium… with no purchase necessary. The founder, lawyer David Goldberg, is an entrepreneur with a flair for fashion and business. The story behind FreshNeck is an interesting and engaging one and David makes a great interview…. plus this makes a perfect Holiday gift! Please let me know if you are interested in interviewing David. I’d be happy to set it up!  🙂

And shortly after, we got another pitch for a company that’s trying to bring back the handwritten note, though without the handwriting part:

Hi [redacted]!

Working on Valentine’s Day yet? Well, this Valentine’s Day do something a little different ! A KindNotes jar is the perfect gift to give, and it brings back the appreciation of a written note(remember those?!). KindNotes are jars of messages that are enclosed in mini envelopes. Each envelope contains a different message you can select from their extensive library of messages, have personalized messages written for you or you can request blank papers to write your own!  Would love to send over a sample for feature consideration! Let me know what you think! 🙂

[Links removed from both.]

Remember, these pitches are referring to a science writer by name. Either this company’s automated system has some serious bugs, or it’s revolutionary in the sense that giving a howler monkey some meth and setting it lose in my apartment would be revolutionary.

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